Finding Prince Charming In A Not So Charming Time

Looking at that husband of mine today, I realized that I got exactly what I was aiming for in the man of my

life. He's the man I dream up as a little girl, the man that can compete beside my grandfather as comparison, and the man I see in every rom-com.

I got insanely lucky. I look around today and have no idea how I would survive the world of dating. I would rather be single for the remainder of my life, and live with two dozen cats and dogs, call up hoarders!

Don't get me wrong, marriage is not for everyone. I never wanted to get married, I actually vowed to never
get married. I just happen to have found the person I can't live without, and any choice I had in the matter no longer existed. Trust me there were times I fought my fate tooth and nail, but God and life kept me falling back into his hands time and time again....he was and is my one and only.

I just can't believe dating today, and how horrible it is. We are currently in a world where Prince Charming really is a fictional character. Girls are acting out because negative attention is now more awarded than positive attention. Girls are competing not just with other girls, but with the absurdity that Hollywood has created, um hello reality tv drama!

There's too much expectation of theatrical behavior and immediate gratification. 

Men have had to change their approach to romance and "courting." Women want to be strong and independent, but yearn for a strong, reliable, take charge man. Men have adapted to the game of ignoring women and flirtingly making them feel dumb or unwanted. What is happening people?! 

We have confused each other, and in the end, all men want is to be a man, to take care of his people (woman/family), to have the answers, and to be the rock his family can lean on. Girls want room to be themselves, to have full trust in their partner, to be fragile when they've had enough of being tough, and to be the one and only desire of their partner.

What I don't understand is how we are all aware of what it takes to change the world of relationships, marriage, and families, but no one chooses to put in the hard work. We want immediate gratification, we don't want to compromise, and we don't want to be patient. I partially blame parents for setting some of these new "I want to live my youth again" standards, and not encouraging young adults to chose the road of faith, commitment, or hard work. Young adults are believing that at the first glare of trouble, boredom, lack of patients, and staleness that they're entitled to leave. This subject is a whole different topic, there are times to call it quits, but for now I suggest reading love dare. In the end even if one part upholds to the right standards a relationship can't maintain from one person, not long term at least.

We have lost trust in each other and the respect of love and appreciation. We allow jagoffs to prowl online looking for quick hookups. Social skills have seriously pumeted, I mean as a woman I can't even expect that what comes out of a guys mouth is genuine, and I do everything in my power to always appear unapproachable because I don't want to end up on the news, and I'm not even looking for a fella! Trust me I know what the guys are dealing with too.

If I read one more sorry story about people online dating and just trying to get into someone's pants.....come on! There's specific places for that garbage, don't alienate someone that is truly in search of their romantic future. Not to mention in general, what kind of human being are you? Do you really use that app to find people near you to just hook up???? GET TESTED MAN! Also, get a soul, I know all the "reasons" why you do this, and let me not be the first to tell you that it's crap.

Back to real life, when I step back and look at my husband I realize that I got my Ryan Gosling, my Channing Tatum, my Thor, and my Iron Man. He is gorgeous, faithful, strong, honest, polite, funny, smart, playful, and 1000% completely and totally in love with me inside and out. He will take care of me no matter how difficult I am, he will find my beauty when I make it hard to find, and he will know who I am when I can't find myself. He surprises me in big and little ways, he reminds me every night that he is thankful for me, he always puts me first, and makes me live in every moment. He is patient, kind, and perfect, and makes me a truly better person.

To anyone that is looking for their perfect someone, set your bar, and set it high. When you find that person that has the potential of reaching your bar, they will work at it every single day until they exceed it. Be open and flexible though, we all have a tendency to expect unrealistic things. Don't forget that you too have to sometimes changes things that may need changing. My marriage wasn't perfect the whole time, we both had to grow and bend together, but we would never make changes that weren't good for us in the end....I am a BETTER person from the compromises and changes that I have made in my relationship.

Today we don't have romance and charm, we have illusion and lust. We have the smokescreen of Hollywood and the desires of hour long movies. The real people in life are the people that want to hear what you expect of them and find ways of treating you exactly how you want.

I'm not saying that in my 10 years any of it has been easy, or that from day 1 our relationship was perfect. It was my husband having the heart, and the soul to stick by me, to fight for US (not me), and to be strong enough to change and grow where it was needed, and having the courage to tell me that I wasn't perfect either.

The world of dating and relationships would be so much more tolerable and beautiful if people would stop comparing, start respecting themselves and others, and stop yearning for attention. Our role models are not celebrities. The number of famous people worth following are slim. Think of the people that truly make you proud, not the people you idolize for lifestyles.